I did not enjoy this day. Despair came nudging and illness and unhappiness and confusion.

I have a small girl in my life who is a comfort I could never have expected. She snuggles in with me and kisses me softly. And sorrows with me.

I have other girls : my own daughter who has cooked me a bolognaise. We have all aged in this time with our heartbreak.


O God. This is disgusting. I need to talk to Pete and Jenny. I need to check on my own reality. I want my son to come home and look after me but he has his own responsibilities.


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