I have banked the money and am organised. I saw the Doctor and am a little shattered. Now and then the trauma of all this flicks its tail at me and improbable tears fall.

Olivia ( doctor) thinks I had a stroke or brain bleed whilst in the Coma. That’s what I thought. Some of my levels are now very good. The liver continues to deteriorate but quite a few of the other levels are good – including the platelets. Doc wants me to go in to rehab for a week but I don’t trust them anymore. I am afraid of being in there. I was sitting here earlier in the dim light that I usually like and just became too sad. I rang my Bro and he talked me through and I am alright now albeit weary and sad and low grade fearful.

I haven’t used.  There we go. Foundation in place. Guess this day must be just about over or I would not be so negative and touchy. I have had a pretty relentless run of people so I would think that I am OVERTIRED. The single most dangerous thing for me to be.  Don’t think tonight. Just fiddle around then go to bed and do your thinking tomorrow.


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